Debra Winger: On Paris, People, and Cinema

At the Festival de la Cinémathèque – 13e édition, held at La Cinémathèque française, Debra Winger is celebrated as one of the most distinctive voices of late 20th-century cinema. Rising to prominence with performances in films like “Terms of Endearment” and “An Officer and a Gentleman”, Winger built a career defined by emotional honesty and resistance to Hollywood conventions.

In this conversation, she reflects on Paris, memory, and the small, fleeting moments that shape a life. Moving between cinema and personal philosophy, Winger offers an honest, unfiltered perspective on acting, not as performance, but as an ongoing investigation of what it means to be human.

IRK: When you arrive in France and drive into Paris, is there any particular thought or feeling that tends to come to mind?

Debra Winger: At my age, having been to Paris many times, it’s usually memories of other visits. But right now, I wake up and think, “Wait a minute, I’m here as me now, for the first time.” Yesterday, my husband and I were walking in the city, jet-lagged, completely immersed, and it was amazing. I suddenly thought, “What are we doing here? How did we get here?” It’s moments like that I remember.

IRK: Does anything ring nostalgic for you when you think about “Forget Paris”?

Debra Winger: Not really. Making a movie puts you in a bubble. I remember it more from a show I did with a wonderful filmmaker, Steve Conrad. It’s called “Patriot”. We shot it in Paris before Covid. I remember the places where we shot, but “Forget Paris” not so much. I do remember that I got to drive a very small, cool car – a Mini Cooper, which I loved. I’ve always wanted a Cobra, but I never got one. It’s the kind of car moms don’t get to drive because you have to have a safe car for babies.

IRK: If you had a completely free day here in Paris, what would your ideal day look like?

Debra Winger: I wander. I don’t plan much. I let things happen. In a museum, I might see two or three things, then leave. I like to really absorb what I see; sometimes three paintings is enough. It’s the same with books. I’m a slow reader. If a paragraph or two is very well written, I stop and just take it in. Paris, or Venice, gives me that feeling. Some cities just strike you. Coming from New York, seeing spring emerge here is magical – buds on the trees, people outside enjoying the sun, it’s life-affirming.

IRK: As an actor, do you feel you understand human nature better, or do people only become more mysterious?

Debra Winger: You realize you never really know anyone. You can be surprised by yourself, so why assume you know others? I love acting because it’s an investigation of human nature. But I don’t end up knowing anything more. I just get to live an example of a time in someone’s life, a slice of life. You mentioned the film “Terms of Endearment”. I accepted that film because of one line: “I know you love me, don’t worry.” Most scenes are “I love you, I’ll be with you forever,” which is generic. The best thing you can say to a kid who will lose her mom is I know you love me, don’t worry. That line makes the film different. Classic.

IRK: If someone followed you for a week to make a documentary about your real life, what do you think would surprise people the most?

Debra Winger: Probably how my life isn’t what anyone would imagine. People can be obsessed with fame and what they think it looks like. I don’t live like that. Some famous people have garages with ten cars, and everyone is exited to see what’s behind the doors. That’s not me. However, I do interesting things. I’m interested in myself, finding out who I am. The goal is always the same: to know myself deeper.

IRK: Is there a character you’ve played whose personality stayed with you a little—maybe a phrase, an attitude, or a way of speaking that slipped into your own life?

Debra Winger: I think it’s the opposite. I steal from my life for my characters. Every film, I bring in pieces of my experiences. Sometimes, a funny line with my husband or kids will come from a film because it just works. I say a line from “Urban Cowboy” a lot: “Fine. Forget it.” You have to say it with that accent. I also borrow from other actors – someone says something perfectly, and I might use it later. We all do that.

IRK: If you could choose one actor, director, or other filmmaker friend to join you at the festival, who would you want by your side?

Debra Winger: It’s funny because two of them that I would choose are here, Costa-Gavras and Jeremy Thomas. They’re incredible to work with. I had a mentor, James Bridges, who passed away young. He would have been my choice too.

IRK: Is there still a part of the movie industry that feels like complete “rocket science” to you?

Debra Winger: I’m not really involved anymore. Calling it an industry sums it up: art and commerce coexisting. Now we work for corporations rather than studios.

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